what the fuck, 2022

acrylic, oil pastel, and ink pen on canvas paper.

in my diy phd class i love how we framed conflict as a site of learning. my coach offered that i make sure i channel my anger in healthy ways, and in fall semester, we got to work on something tactile for the last hour or so of class. i remembered why i liked to work larger and to work vertically: it allows greater space for movement of my arm and hand to pull the material across the surface, or to allow liquid to drip. it makes me think about how anger, like a lot of other emotions, is a full-body experience. it makes sense to move back and forth on my feet.

when i worked on this—it’s technically a triptych—this all felt pretty automatic and subconscious. i wasn’t expecting to use tarot symbolism, but they’re there. it feels like a journey or some kind of unfolding. definitely reflective of a big heartbreak… and non-objectivity in correlation to decentering outcomes.

i also don’t take my current physical (visual) work so seriously at the moment, so who knows what this is.